Short , unhelpful Advice

Dear Readers, I've been busy making comic books with children all week, and am thus feeling very worn out. I wanted to hand you some advice, though, so here you are. Short, sweet, knee jerk advice.
Send me more questions!


Dear Nicole,
as a feminist, what's your take on having a girl's night out? just one or two nights a month where any self identified boys can't come?
- Feminist in Fresno



Dear Fresnan,
Sure, why not. What’s the issue? Of COURSE you should have a girl’s night out.
Don’t trip.




Dear Nicole,
my roommate and her boyfriend have the loudest sex ever. i feel like a prisoner in my own home when they are banging. I can't read or watch tv or even go into my room because of how loud they are!
What to do?
Signed,
Eve S. Dropping


Dear Eve,
Bang the ceiling with a broom when they’re having sex. Or do something to kill the magic so they know you’re listening. Knock on the door and say “You have a phone call”. Or “Do you know where the Anusol is?”

If you want to be more practical,
let your roommate know that you can hear them by dropping some wordage the next day.
“So, sounds like you and Mr. McGillicutty were really getting wild last night. I'm glad that you're , um, 'In Love', but I don't want to hear what you're doing. It's distracting and the sound carries throughout the entire house. “

This is a basic point of maturity and respect. Your roommate is acting in an inconsiderate way and invading your personal space. Give your roommate a little reminder that you're here, you have ears, and they need to get used to it.


side note:
Once I had one very rude roommate who told me it was my problem if I didn’t want to be woken up by my bed rocking from HER getting boned on the other side of the wall.
Now I live alone.





Dear Nicole,
Should I buy a condo or is that just dumb? Cheaper than rent but not the cottage in the woods that I want but cannot afford. Puts my kids in the right school district.
-Confused in Kentucky



Dear Confused,
I don’t know much about real estate, but I say Sure. Why not.
There are no perks to renting, in my opinion.
Buy a condo.
If you hate it, just sell it later. People seem to like condos.
Then you can use the credit you’ve built and maybe buy a (drafty) house (in need of repair) that you like better.



Dear Nicole,
Should I take an anonymous tech job in the suburbs or a public job as a barista at a hip coffeeshop? I am over thirty.
- Quizzical in Quebec


Dear Quiz Master,

As someone with a "cool" job who hasn't eaten a tortilla chip in over a year based on my lack of dental coverage, I say
Take the job in the suburbs.
You’ll have health insurance , there’s room for advancement, and you can set a good boundary between work and real life.


Sincerely,
N.G.